Back in July when I wrote “Have you Had the Talk” I was going to leave it at that. Since that time many things have transpired so I want to start expanding on that a bit as more and more people are talking to me about the same topic.
My siblings and I are fortunate that mom and dad took care of their money and investments. So far there has been little “investment” from the children toward this care but there has definitely been some close scrutiny to make sure things are in place. We have been fortunate that dad has allowed us that access with very little struggle. Looking in to different types of help such as veteran benefits and Medicaid, the difficulty that I have seen is that you have to be almost completely destitute financially in order to go down that path. Since mom and dad handled things well, we would have to play the game of them turning everything over to someone to appear to not have anything and then use those programs. It is important that you take the time to pursue every avenue of help you can, but know that it is time consuming. We are talking about doing what we can for our parents and yet I still believe we can never afford what our parents truly deserve.
If you have had the privilege of meeting my parents, you know as well as I do they pay their own way. They still have their house which is a mile away from mine. I write out bills for dad on a regular basis and if I am not available, my older sister handles that chore.
Once again, if you haven’t had the talk, don’t wait. Yes, it is hard to do, yes, people don’t want you in their stuff, but having to make decisions when you have no choice and emotions are high is a tough way to go.
So much to learn and so little time.